… donations if at all possible. We just got done paying out nearly 2k to hook up into the town’s new sewer system. They told us originally that there would be “help” to pay for it, but they failed to mention that you have to be over 60 years old in order to qualify for it, which just figures. Oh, and our sump pump gave out, too, which was another stupid thing to be replaced. When it rains it pours, which is just enough to make me feel like moving into a box under a bridge somewhere … *sigh*

Right now, we’re in dire need of roof repairs (the 20×10 foot section, roughly 200 square feet) that will cost around 500.00 as well as trying to save up for the genetic testing that our son needs in order to diagnose whether or not he has maple syrup urine disorder. The roof is in really bad shape right over the kids’ room, and we found out this weekend that there’s a small area in the closet that has developed a hole. We were hoping to do the roof this month, but with everything else that has sneaked up on us, I’m worried that we won’t be able to. And yeah, the roof is THAT bad that it isn’t going to last much more than a few months. When we first figured out that it needed to be repaired, Eric’s hours had been cut down drastically, and now, while Eric’s hours are a little better, they’re still not back where they were before.

All help would be greatly appreciated 🙂

So I figured that I’d better post something about why I’ve not been updating and probably won’t be updating regularly for awhile.  You know, you’d have thought that the last year was a big enough financial slap in the face to most of the people in America, but no, it really does get worse, right?

Let me preface this by saying that when I walk to the post office or to get a newspaper out of the one machine in the town, I tend to smile and wave at anyone I see, whether I know them or not because I live in such a small place that it’s common to do so.  Let me also preface this by saying that our roof over our kids’ room is bad—really bad.  We know it’s bad, and we know that it desperately needs replaced.  We also know that we don’t have the money to do it at the moment.  Two years ago when we had the money (when it was first starting to become an issue), Eric’s mom died.  Now what was I supposed to do?  Tell him, “Gee, honey, sorry about your mom.  That really bites.  Now get your ass out there and fix the roof!”

Yeah.  Not.

So last year (it was leaking during rain pretty badly), we had the time as Eric was laid off for a couple weeks here and there, but no money.  None.

Anyway, out of the blue, one of my neighbors stops in a month or two ago and offers to help us out by giving us roofing (they’d just finished roofing her shed) and that she’d help putting it up.  I was shocked, and my gut reaction was to tell her that we’d get it ourselves, but you know, I have kids, and they’re the most important people in the world to me, and my pride isn’t nearly as important to me as they are, so I said a grateful, “yes”.

Then I didn’t hear from her again.  I could’ve called her, I suppose, but again, the pride thing, and I kept thinking, ‘how would that sound?  By the way, weren’t you going to fix my roof?’

Now, we’re talking about a twenty foot by ten foot square that direly needs replaced, and it’s going to cost us around $400.00 (or less) to actually get all the materials and do it, but …

But the woman and her husband had a guy staying with them whose wife had kicked him out and gotten a restraining order against him.  Despite the restraining order that she asked for, she calls over to the woman’s house constantly, harassing her estranged husband to come over and fix this and that and what have you.  What does this have to do with me?  Well, I’m getting to that.

So on the day before my birthday, I get a letter in the mail indicating that we’re currently under investigation by the welfare department because of OUR ROOF.  That’s right; our roof.  That damned project that the economy screwed us on.  Now, the social worker claims that she doesn’t have any intention of taking my kids, but hell … maybe I’m just sadistic or something, but I can’t help thinking ‘what if …?’ …

I ended up calling the woman who had offered to help in the first place to tell her that I didn’t appreciate her coming over here and saying she wants to help, only to get a good look at our house and the water damage in the kids’ room so that she could turn us in.  It turns out that she didn’t, but she knew who did because she was bragging about it to her husband because he’d offered to help the woman put our roof on which meant he wouldn’t be able to fix whatever his estrange wife wanted fixed at the drop of a hat for … what?  Three days at most, as long as it took to complete our roof.  She’s also turned in half of the town I live in because they’re “nice” to her estranged husband, for everything from having a few pieces of siding down on their houses to having a hole in the yard where they’d excavated a tree trunk last summer.

Like any of that matters.  All I know is that I am sitting here, worrying that my kids are going to be taken away because of some woman’s ignorant show of jealousy and four hundred frigging dollars that seems like a mountain ahead of us.

Anyway, I’ll update when I can or when I feel settled enough to actually sit down to put a string of words together, and I’m sorry if that’s not good enough.  It really is the best I can do.

Merry Christmas.

I guess that’s a good way to start a Christmas letter to everyone.  When I think back over the time that’s passed since last Christmas, I have to smile—and shed a few tears, too.  The generosity of strangers has touched me—us—in such a way that a simple thank you seems so trite, yet it is all I can really say.

So I guess that I should add here that we finished Christmas shopping for our boys last night.  Maybe we don’t have copious amounts of stuff under the tree, but we were able to get them things that they’d really like, and I have to say that my oldest made me so proud this year.  One of his school friends was really depressed one day.  Apparently, his mom had told him that they might have to move.  He admitted to my son that his mom had lost her job just before Christmas last year—we knew that—and that, like us, she’d had trouble paying her property taxes, so even though her house was hers, the county was going to take her house because she didn’t have the money to pay.  Now, her property taxes weren’t really any worse than ours, but the problem for her is that her husband left her when her son (now nearly seventeen, the same age as my son) was a baby, and she hadn’t seen him since.  Because of that, though, she’d always worked two jobs, so when she lost her main job—the one that paid the bills and kept her out of the welfare line—she only had the other.  Long and short of it was that this boy’s mother was going to lose her house.  So my son came to me and asked me how much I was going to spend on him for Christmas.  It was kind of a weird question coming from him, so I asked him why?  I mean, isn’t it the thought that counts?  (Yes, I was a little irked at that point.  I mean, I didn’t think I’d raised a greedy kid …)

And he looked me in the eye and he said, “Mom, Cody’s going to have to move because they can’t afford to pay their taxes, but even then, they don’t have anywhere to go.  Could you give her the money you were going to spend on me for Christmas?  I’d rather keep a friend than open presents on Christmas day.”

I just stared at him—just stared.  I think I might’ve stared at him for close to a whole minute before my eyes filled with tears, and I grabbed him and hugged him and told him that I was so proud of him.  Granted, we didn’t have a lot of money to spend on him, but since my husband’s hours had picked up somewhat, we did have some.

So I called Cody’s mom and I tried to find a good way to ask her how much she needed to come up with.  Turns out that a few others had heard about it and had offered her money to help her.  She was only about $150.00 short, and while we hadn’t really figured on spending that much on Christmas per kid, I couldn’t stand to see her that close to her goal and not help her.

So we skimped on groceries for a week, cut back on gas money and extra trips to town, and we gave her what she needed, and I thought, you know, isn’t that what Christmas is all about, anyway?

In the end, we were able to get my son one video game, and my youngest is always cheaper to buy for.  The point is, even now, looking at our tree and seeing how few presents are under there, I still feel good because that feeling that we actually could help someone who really needed it is a beautiful, beautiful thing, and to everyone who helped us when the situation was reversed? Thank you.  God bless you.  May you look at your Christmas tree and smile, too.

So I got to thinking, what can I do to say a small thank you to everyone who cared, whether they could afford to help us or not, or even if they did nothing more than drop me an email to let me know that they were praying for us.

Well, I guess it’s this: I wrote a one shot.  What’s different about that?  Nothing, I guess.  I mean, I do that every Christmas, don’t I?    But that’s what I can do, isn’t it?  What I do best, really.  I can only hope that you all enjoy reading the story as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it.  Look for it on Christmas Eve day, okay?

Oh, and to everyone?  Thanks for bearing with me this year.  Here’s hoping that 2010 is even better!

Happy Holidays,

Sue

Hey, guys. I really was hoping not to have to ask for help again, but I do. See, we got a letter from the county treasurer/auditor’s office, and the gist of it was that we have to pay both last fall as well as this spring’s taxes on our house or the state will sell it at auction, and while we might have been able to do something if we’d had some time, they only gave us until September 4th to pay it. We just don’t have it. I’ve called family and those I know to ask for help, but again, no one has the money to help us. The total we need is $710.27 by September 4th. Thanks to a sweet forumer who read my posts about this right after we’d gotten the letter earlier today, we only need $500.00 now. Please, if you can possibly help, please please do. Our house is paid for, which means that we just pay property taxes, and we just can’t afford to be kicked out and have to pay rent somewhere, and I know that I’ve asked you all before to help if you can, and so many of you have, and for that, I so appreciate you all.

Thanks for taking the time to read this post, and above all, I hope God keeps you safe and well.

Sue

I really, really don’t know what to do. I’m so stressed out that it isn’t even funny. We made it through my husband’s off time thanks to some really great people. Now they tell him that they’re cutting him down to three days a week, which will about kill us. I talked to the welfare department but they won’t even look at us until our income has been affected for at least 60 days, which just figures. They say that if we qualify for help (and there’s a good chance we won’t), they’ll pay us back to the date when we first lost income, but that doesn’t really help. What are we supposed to do until then? And Eric can’t apply for unemployment; if he does, there’s a good chance he’ll be fired (they’ll invent a reason; that’s how they operate). Even if he filed a complaint, you have to have money for a lawyer, and even then, you’d lose. They laid off someone earlier because he had a gimp leg, and they told him that he couldn’t physically do his job (but he was like that when they hired him, right?) He tried to sue them, but they came up with reasons why he’d been let go and denied having said anything about his disability.

I’ve freaked out so badly that I just don’t know anymore. On top of that, our stupid lawnmower blew up, too, and with no money to get a new one or even a used one if we could find one, now I get to worry that we’ll be cited if our yard gets too long. I mean, heck, they cited our neighbors for having a hole in his siding from the ice storm we had back in December . . .

They say that the economy is picking up, but I just don’t see it. They also say it’s darkest before the dawn, but I just don’t see that, either. This is why people lose hope, and I can’t help but to think in the back of my mind that we do have life insurance and that I’m worth $250,000 if I died, and even if I don’t have any intention of doing anything stupid, I am starting to understand why someone would.

I just don’t know what to do anymore, and I’m just so tired of thinking about it all the time. I just needed to vent, you know? Anyway, thanks for listening 🙂

Some lovely fanarts by the very talented Titiana were added 🙂 Enjoy!!

  Sydnie in the Snow

Jillian

Princess Lei-Me (Jillian)

Evan and Valerie

Bellaniece and Isabelle