Thursday, August 1, 2013


Hey, folks. Figured I should post an update to keep you all informed as to what’s going on around here. While we’ve been able to do a bit of the work, thanks to everyone’s generosity, we’re still fighting an uphill battle, or so it seems. Every time we think we’ve gotten to the root of one problem or another, there’s something else that crops up that we didn’t realize before. Right now, we were able to stop the leaking with Ice Shield (fabulous stuff even if it is expensive) but we’re facing the idea that we’re going to have to gut the back room and remove all the insulation and replace it all due to black mold, and if you’ve ever dealt with that, you know that you can’t just paint over it or try to hide it because that stuff is nasty with a capital N. It’s gotten into my lungs bad enough that I sound like a frog when I try to talk, despite wearing a mask while working on it all. The good news is that we’ve gotten most of the walls down and gutted, and we’ve gotten two of the four of them insulated and ready to drywall.

The thing is, things went from bad to worse, too. My sister-in-law, in one of her many fits of nastiness, recently found out about the mold on the back porch, and even though we don’t talk to her (because of other crap she’s pulled over the years) she’s out to cause trouble. Another sister-in-law told us yesterday that she was told that the nasty one is going to turn us into the housing authority “for our own good”… Before you ask, yes, she’s nasty enough to do this because she’s a hateful, vindictive person who has never liked me because I took away her baby brother, because I don’t listen to her “advice”, because I won’t kiss up to her to make her feel like a bigger person. Let’s put it this way: she turned us into the welfare years ago because she was MAD at me, and that was the last straw. The only hope I have is to get everything fixed before she can make good on her threat/promise because they’ll condemn our house, and the only thing about that? We can barely afford our bills now. Add a rent payment on top of that? It’ll ruin us completely.

I know it’s asking a lot. I know that. Honestly, I wouldn’t if I wasn’t desperate. Now I have to worry about her self-righteous garbage on top of everything else, and I just wonder when all of this will ever end? Why isn’t it good enough that we’re doing the very best we can? Why? Now her and her nasty threats? I keep telling myself that karma will deal her in the end, but you know, I can’t help but wonder why all of this stuff? Why now? Why on top of everything else? So I hate to ask, but I will. If you can possibly help us, you have no idea how much we appreciate it, and those who have, just please know that I love each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart, absolutely. And hopefully my next update will have much, much better news with it.

Or log into paypal and click on the Send Money tab. My email is

posted by Sueric at 10:13 pm  

Friday, July 26, 2013

Thank you :)

I just wanted to say THANK YOU to the wonderful people who have sent me support, both monetary and in thoughts and prayers. It means a lot. We still need about 600 more on the roof/kitchen/back porch in supplies … I don’t know if anyone can help us here, but if so, it’d be GREATLY appreciated… Because the roof was leaking so badly, it ruined our kitchen floor, to the point where there are areas that are in danger of falling through. We have a few sheets of plywood covering the really bad parts but it didn’t do any good to fix it all when there were still leaky spots. The first thing we’re trying to do is to get the mold on the back porch under control—we hope. That stuff is a pain to deal with because by the time you see it, it means that there’s a lot behind the walls that you can’t see, and those will have to be torn out completely and rebuilt. We can do it; we just need the funding. As humbling as it is, I am going to post pictures of our kitchen ceiling, just so you can see what I’m talking about and that honestly, I’m not joking about any of it. That’s the ceiling that completely fell in. Yeah, it’s not pretty.

IMG_20130718_131854 IMG_20130718_131859

For those who have asked, yes, we’ve tried to apply for help from some of the places around here that will do that kind of thing. The problem we’ve run into is that they all have a backlog of people they’re already helping, well into next summer, and, well, we can’t wait that long. I did sign up to help with some of them, though, because I figure that it’s the least I can do, even if we cannot wait for help ourselves. It seems like all the agencies around here are stretched to their limits already, and it’s sad but it just goes to show that Indiana on a whole is NOT okay.

In any case, I hate to ask, but I must… if anyone has the inclination to help us still, please see my last post (below this one) for the donation links, and again, THANK YOU SO MUCH to those who have helped us and who continue to inspire me. I love you all, and I am trying to get myself back into the frame of mind to write again. I refuse to leave Valerie and Evan hanging if I can help it, but your kindness has gone a long way toward easing my mind. I think that the real reason I posted anything at all was simply because I was scared and still am. I can literally feel the edges of depression creeping up on me, and it’s a struggle to fend them off every day. I think that anyone would start to feel hopeless and lost after a time, too, and it sucks. It really does. But your thoughts and prayers have helped me already. I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart!

posted by Sueric at 6:29 pm  

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Status Update

Hey. I know a lot of you are wondering where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing. We’ve been trying to get some work done on our house, and we’ve done what we could. There’s been a lot of crap going on around here, and it’s all kind of just bearing down on me, to the point where I have trouble functioning daily, if I want to be honest. It’s one of those situations where you feel like it’s never going to be okay, no matter what you do, you know? And every time you turn around, it just gets worse. To be completely frank, I feel like I’m at the very end of my rope.


After Alex’s Jeep was totaled, we used the insurance money to pay for another car because as you know, having just one car with two working adults is nearly impossible, especially when one of them works odd hours (Alex). Then we used the rest of the money to catch up on bills we hadn’t had a chance to pay, and we’re not talking a lot of bills. We’ve already cut down to the bare minimum as far as that goes. The problem is that the electric bill always runs over 200 bucks every month, and it sucks. On top of that, we’re barely able to squeak by week after week.


But you know, it doesn’t matter, does it? Because the worst thing in the world happens when you can least afford anything, right? So the roof over the back of our house that we knew was going bad decided to fall in. It’d been going for a while, I admit that, but when you don’t have the money to fix it, and I mean, really don’t have the money to fix it, then it’s a problem. We were able to get ice shield over it all, but we had to buy three rolls of it @100 bucks per roll (ouch). Then the car breaks down (another 160.), then our water switch for the house went out (only 20 but you get where I’m going here, right?), and to top it all off nicely, our front burner on the stove went out, too, which is not a big deal until you realize that the other front burner on our stove went out a while ago, so we only have the small back burners left working since those are fifty bucks apiece. Then we had no money for groceries at all, had no food, no help, no nothing. That’s where we are, and you’re not going to read about this on Facebook; I never post stuff like this there because, really, what’s the point? The point is, at this point, I am ready to give up, completely and utterly.


So in an effort to get some money from Eric’s 401k (our only option left), we filled out all the stuff they wanted, but they want an ‘official estimate’. We can’t. Firstly, there isn’t anyone who will do one without being paid (which we don’t have). Secondly, licensed contractors are required by law to report certain things, like black mold, and if they report that, the health department will condemn our house until it’s been fixed, and we cannot afford to move even temporarily. We’re so finished, it’s not funny. We can’t even get the money to help ourselves. I’ve been through it in my head so many times, and there’s just nothing. Not a thing that could help us or save us. We’re absolutely done. Needless to say, at this point, the stories are useless, pointless. I can’t get my head around real life stuff, so writing just seems frivolous when all I keep thinking is that if Eric could just work a couple days of overtime, we’d be okay. We’re not okay. No one is hiring, let alone hiring someone who hasn’t worked in 20 years because she wanted to raise her family, because she has a handicapped child that takes priority over everything. No one wants to hire me because I made a mistake 13 years ago and was convicted of a felony. They see that and that’s all they see. They don’t know if I have done anything to make sure that I don’t make the same mistake again (I did. I asked the court to order me to get counseling because we couldn’t afford it, so if the court ordered it, I wouldn’t have to pay for it when we didn’t have it.). They only see the “yes” box ticked next to have you ever been convicted of a felony? I’ll be honest here. All I can think of lately is that if I accidentally died, Eric could have my life insurance. They say God doesn’t let anything happen to you that you cannot handle, but I’m starting to wonder. I feel like I’m balancing on the edge of depression, and I’ve been there before. It’s an ugly place, and the whole thing is just dirty and terrible, but that’s where I feel like I’m going. So sorry about the lack of updates. At this point, I just don’t know when or how or anything. I just don’t know.

Or log into paypal and click on the Send Money tab. My email is

You can use the button at the top of to donate if you wish. Look for the PayPal button in the top menu bar.

posted by Sueric at 10:32 am  

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Happy Holidays

Ah, it’s that time of year again … time for snow and carolers and all that happy crap … Around here? Well, I’ve been pretty busy. Those who have been on the forum know that I have been having some things going on with my family, namely my daddy. He’s been in the hospital since before Thanksgiving, and he seems to be doing a little better every day, so thank you to everyone who has taken a moment to send up a little prayer for him!



I wanted to give a few updates as to what, exactly, I’ve been doing with writing. As many of you know, I’ve been heavily editing the existing chapters of Desideratum (yes, Desideratum). I’ve got a chapter done and in beta at present (look for it in the next few days). I’ve decided that I really like the premise of this story, so I’m going to continue it as a divergence instead of the usual continuation. Originally, I stopped posting to see what Ms. Takahashi was going to do to my beloved characters as the manga seemed to be winding down. After she finished it, however, I thought that I couldn’t continue because she’d wrapped everything up so wonderfully already. It was one of those rare moments when I felt as though everything I’d hoped for came to pass. But because of that, I wasn’t entirely sure I could do anything with Desideratum because, I’ll be honest, I don’t LIKE non-canon and am a firm believer that the original author must be respected. It is, after all, her work.



That said, I spent the Thanksgiving weekend re-reading Chronicles. And I thoroughly enjoyed it. I will confess, I’d forgotten a lot of it, so it was like reading a story I’d never read before (seriously), and I was so thirsty for more InuYasha/Kagome fluff that I did what I never, ever thought I’d do: I re-read Metamorphosis—and I was able to do so without the negative feelings that had followed me around for so long with that story. I was able to look at it the way I’d wanted to all along, and, yes, I actually felt a bit proud of what I’d managed to accomplish with it. Yes, I know, it needs some editing here and there, and maybe I’ll get to that eventually, however ..



As I was reading those stories, this thought kept nagging at me. I kept thinking, ‘I miss those two. I miss writing those two. I miss the distinctive relationship they have, and no matter what the circumstances, they always—always—make me laugh.’ Then I started to consider the parts of the story that cannot work, given the framework of Takahashi’s original and completed work. Well, I realized that with some minor tweaking and one major divergence, it could still work. I tried to figure out if I actually could use the rest of the manga and just re-write to be a real continuation, buuuuuuut …



So bearing in mind that the divergence occurs within Desideratum just after the fight with Naraku and before Kagome gets sucked into the Shikon no Tama, I’ve decided to do what makes ME happy… and continue this story, after all. Now, the plan at present is to finish Purity 9: Subterfuge (there really isn’t a lot left …. Not sure if people realize this or not), and then I’m going to take a (gasp!!) Purity break long enough to devote my time to telling the story of Desideratum before I go back to pick up where I left off with Purity 10: Anomaly, Purity 11 (the enigma lol), and Purity 12: Rebirth. I also plan on working the rest of the original Purity rewrites into the scheme of things, as well but that’s secondary. I feel compelled to work on Desideratum right now. (I know; I know … never say ‘never’, right?)



Sooooo … is there anything I can tell you about Desideratum? Firstly and most importantly, please do take the time to read the edits. There have been a number of changes to make the story fit into canon as well as some other things that I changed … just because. Not as important but noteworthy is that InuYasha’s last name in present day has been changed to something more befitting: Akamori (red forest), and, because I didn’t like the name Renzomori, his name is now “Sora”, which means sky. It was almost Kuro but that sounded odd, given his looks lol. I’m pretty sure that Sora will be a character that no one expects—I hope. I think you’ll be surprised when you learn who he really is… maybe.



Another thing worth noting is that, starting with Purity 10 (I haven’t decided on whether or not to do so with Desideratum), new chapters will appear here in my blog a day or two before being posted on Media Miner. The reason for this is because of some site issues that keep popping up there, and no one seems to be willing or able to fix them, so I’m not entirely sure how long that site will be around. So saying, I am trying to encourage people to read the site instead. Comments should be easy to leave here, too. I believe that the site here is set up to require registration, and the first comment you post will be monitored to keep from allowing spam bots and stuff to post freely. After your first comment is approved, however, I THINK that any future comments will post automatically. I think. Lol, I’ll have to check into that …



Thanks for those who helped pay for the server costs. With my dad’s health and my husband’s cut hours at work, we simply don’t have the money to pay for them. We’re still accepting donations because there’s a third server as well as some domain renewals to pay, but the main site is paid for already.



I want to wish everyone a merry holiday season and lots of love. Prayers for my daddy are still very welcome, and I hope that you all have a safe and happy Christmas and New Year!

posted by Sueric at 12:27 am  

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Update ~ Happy 2012

Guess it’s been a long while since I posted anything, huh? Sorry about that. To be honest, I couldn’t do much but sleep for a long while. The issues I’d been having with my blood sugar were really rough for a time. It was pretty bad for a bit. Then the holidays crept up and bit me, and then a very unexpected reunion caught me by surprise. To make a long story short, just after I’d posted the first chapter of the holiday short, my husband’s brother’s mother-in-law died, and they had to come up for the funeral. It was a brother that my husband hadn’t seen in roughly 25 years. It definitely took precedence, as I’m sure you all understand.

I still do have some moments when I just need to lie down and rest. It seems like the mind is willing, but my body fights me sometimes. I am going to get back to work on the holiday short this week after I get my youngest back to school again, so rest assured, I haven’t forgotten.

I also haven’t forgotten Evan and Valerie, either. I plan on returning to them as soon as the holiday short is finished, but I’ve decided to do something a little different this time. I’m going to finish the story before I resume posting. Now, before anyone gets upset (if anyone’s still looking for the end of the tale), there really is a reason I’m doing it this way. To put it simply, there’s a LOT of stuff that I want to make sure is completely right before I post it. Often times, I just post the story as it goes without always waiting for the betas (mostly Mel because she’s not always accessible. Greta has beta’ed almost every chapter I’ve ever written before I’ve posted them since she started working with me lol) However, there are a lot of things that I want to make sure are there, and I don’t feel right in posting something, only to hear from Mel that I’d forgotten something, big or small. I mean, does anyone ever go back and re-read when I post edits? Lol, I’m not even sure that I would! But it’s for that reason that I want to finish the story before I post the rest. Rough projection is that there are about… thirty chapters left, give or take. Knowing me, there’ll be more like fifty, but honestly, I don’t think so.

I do also want to apologize to everyone who was/is reading Evan and Valerie’s story. I didn’t mean to leave anyone in the lurch. Those of you who know me know that I really didn’t mean to do any such thing, but at the same time, those who know me also know that I don’t often talk about personal issues, either. I was kind of blind-sided by my health issues, and there were some days that I never got out of bed. I’m doing much better now though I still need to get to the doctor for some testing. Just can’t really afford it (and my husband’s health insurance isn’t worth two nickels), so I did what I could do, basically.

In any case, I just wanted to let everyone know what’s going on. Thanks to everyone who sent words of concern. It was greatly appreciated, and I apologize for not responding to them personally.

Here’s to a better 2012!!

posted by Sueric at 12:45 am  

Friday, January 21, 2011

What Teddy Really Thinks …

Apparently, my dog, Teddy doesn’t think much of my writing.  I mean, look what he typed in my latest chapter …

Teddy's words

This is what my dog thinks of my writing ...

posted by Sueric at 9:08 pm  

Monday, July 12, 2010

Two Years

Two years.


That sounds like such a long time, doesn’t it?  Two years …

I mean, if you think about it, a lot can happen in just two years, right?

A recession, a change of presidents, a change of eras … In two years, I’ve learned that there are some people who I should be able to trust but cannot and others who I didn’t trust who have since proved that they are sincere.  In two years, I’ve realized that little boys can and do grow up to be young men.  In two years, I’ve found that some people whom I have considered friends are more like family.  In two years, I’ve found that some family are not worthy of that distinction.

In two years, I’ve learned what it is like to lose a good friend disguised as a pet.  In two years, I’ve learned to open my heart to other pets that have needed me almost as much as I needed them.  I’ve learned that to truly be happy in this world, you have to let go of things that just don’t matter.  In two years, I’ve learned to hold onto those things that really, really do.

In two years, I’ve laughed, and I’ve cried.  In two years, I’ve wondered if I’d be able to open my eyes in the morning without worrying about things that I cannot control.  In two years, I’ve realized time and again that my best friend is the man I married.  In two years, I’ve come to understand that it’s all right to see him cry, too.

There’s just one thing that has remained the same over the course of two years.  It is a strange thing, I think, that in those same two years that have molded me, the constant sense of loss is still there.  Oh, I don’t cry very often anymore.  I can smile when I remember, and I can laugh at the funny things.  I can see things with more clarity than I saw back then, too.  I suppose that it’s a normal thing, isn’t it?

The sun still rises, and the sun still sets.  The moon goes through its phases in the midst of a starry sky.  Sometimes I sit beside her grave, and I think that everything really is all right.  Maybe it’s because I can feel her more now than I did two years ago.  I’d like to think that she’s our angel now, that incredible woman that we knew as “mom”.  Though we cannot hear her voice any longer, we can still feel her presence.  It’s always there, in the touch of the breeze that ruffles your hair.  It’s there in the sigh when the light of the world touches the darker hues of the descending night, and that night is no longer a scary place.  It has been tempered by a gentleness that came from her, or so I like to think.

I’d like to think that she’s happier now—happier because she can watch over all of those she held dear, not just the ones she could see, and I know without a doubt at all that she is still here, and if that is so, then there is one thing that I need to say.

Mom, I want to thank you: thank you for welcoming me into your family, thank you for smiling when you could’ve cried, for laughter and for understanding.  Thank you for the gentle advice and the times when you said nothing at all.  How did you know when I just needed someone to listen?  How did you know when I needed you to tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself?  And I am ashamed to admit that I didn’t say ‘thank you’ nearly enough, especially when I realize that the single greatest thing that you did for me was something that I never got to thank you for.  For that man I married, the one I love: I thank you for him most of all.  Through your guidance and your love, you helped him to become the person I adore, and if I have one regret, it’s that I didn’t hug you one more time, that I didn’t tell you that I held you in the highest of regard.

Two years have passed since you slipped out of our lives, but … but you’re still here, aren’t you, Mom?  So I won’t say goodbye now, either.  Instead I’ll smile when I look up into the clear blue sky.  When I hear my children laugh, I’ll think of you then, too, and I’ll try every day to remember that one day, I want to be a guardian for those I leave behind, just like you are.

Two years.

Two years.

posted by Sueric at 10:06 pm  

Monday, June 21, 2010

Help needed?

Hey, guys.  I am hoping to ask for your help once again, and I sincerely hope that you guys can come through for me.  See, as many of you know, we’ve had some pretty severe trouble with Skylar, our youngest son, lately.  Because of his trouble and the fact that we cannot get our insurance to cover him for the seizures or anything, we are faced with some pretty severe financial trouble.  We’ve managed to pay those bills, but we haven’t been able to pay for much of anything else, and now we’ve got another issue with our property taxes because they’re do no later than June 30, 2010 or they’ll auction our house.  I’ve tried talking to them, tried to get them to grant us an extension but they won’t.

Please, if anyone  has anything to spare, please help us.  I know, I’ve asked for help so many times, and I just wish that things would straighten out for us now.  If we can just get this taken care of, we should be okay.  It’s just another thing among many to deal with, and this is my last hope.  The donation button at the top of the forum works for this purpose, and I thank you for taking the time to read this post.

Please, and thank you,


EDIT (6/24/10)

I could still really use your help, guys.  Thanks to everyone’s generosity thus far, I’m about 1/2 way there, but I’ve got less than a week to get this paid, and I’m so hoping that I can do it.  If not, we’ll figure something out, I’m sure, and it does no good to stress out over things.  I’m just hoping, I guess.

A huge thanks to everyone who has helped thus far, and if anyone can help out, please, please do so.


posted by Sueric at 9:32 am  

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Frequently Asked Question #2

Frequently Asked Question #2

“Do you like reviews?”

Short answer: yes.

Long answer: yes, I do. It always makes me sad, though, when people say that they don’t review often because they just want to say ‘good job’ or something. To break it down, what a review means to me is that someone—anyone—read and enjoyed what I wrote. I don’t get paid for writing and posting these stories. I don’t want to. The only thing I ‘get’ is reviews. A published author knows from book sales and royalties how many people are reading their stories, and in a broad sense, buying a book is akin to saying that you enjoy the author’s work. To me, a review is a way of ‘thanking’ me for the hours I stressed out over one single word that just wasn’t right to convey the emotion I’m trying to create. They encourage me when I feel like I’m tossing these chapters out there and no one notices. I know, that sounds silly. It’s very true, and not just for me, but for everyone who gets the courage to post online.

Let’s face it: some people are a nasty lot. I mean that they want to be nasty and they actively search for ways to make themselves feel better for whatever reason by being nasty. There are people out there who would just as soon tear you down than leave you alone. I have never quite understood this, and frankly, I have more important things to worry about than some crackpot who has nothing better to do than to troll the internet, looking for things to hate. I actually feel sorry for people like that. I mean, why not look for something positive than to gripe about something negative? I know that I tend to exhaust myself if I try to carry around any kind of negativity. I can only imagine how weary their souls have to be, and in that sense, I pity them.

It’s a funny thing to me. I can’t count the number of times that a review has made my day just a little brighter, and it doesn’t have to be a long one, either. There are days when I truly just want to toss everything into a corner and forget that I ever posted a single word online. Then someone takes the time to review, just to say that they enjoyed a story or a chapter, and I remember again. I keep posting because of people like that. That’s why they’re important to me.

posted by Sueric at 5:47 am  

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Frequently Asked Question #1

Frequently Asked Questions Pt 1

Today’s question:

“Which Purity is your favorite?”

I always laugh when I read this question.  I mean, it’s so subjective, isn’t it?  I know, I know, everyone has their favorites, right?  And it’s funny because my answer is invariably the same every time: they all are.

That totally sounds like a cop-out, doesn’t it?  Seriously, it does.  I know it, and you know it.  It sounds so … superficial.  (You know: “Oh, here’s the perfect answer!”)

I am being serious, though—serious as a heart attack, for lack of a better phrase.  (I’m pretty sure that one is a fairly mid-western thing to say.  Ah, well.  I won’t worry about it too much until I start chewing tobacco and spitting farther than my husband can.  ‘Course, that would also mean that he’d have to start chewing, too, and I think that’s kinda nasty … ewwww …)

It’s an odd thing, but I’m pretty sure that there are some folks who have read the stories more often than I have.  As horrible as it is to admit this, I guess I can.  I … actually haven’t ever re-read any of my stories.  Not one.  I guess it’s as simple as I know what’s in there (or at least, I did) and I don’t have any desire to re-tell a story—probably the real reason I hate editing.  Oh, I’ve re-read chapters here and there.  I’ve even set out to re-read them all at different points.  Then I see something shiny, and, well, I guess you can tell the rest.

But I’m still serious about them all being my favorites.  I guess I should explain myself?  It’s the characters.  I’ll let you in on a pretty big secret: I have to love a character in order to devote that much time and attention to writing a story about him or her (both).  I mean, I have to really adore them.  It’s an odd thing, but in many ways, it’s like having children.  Each of the characters, starting with InuYasha and Kagome, are characters that I adore, but as much as I love them, I also want to see them grow.  I mean, my favorite characters are the ones who have to overcome a lot of issues in order to flourish, in order for them to achieve their happy ending.  Look at InuYasha, for example.  I mean, who had it worse than that poor boy?

Purity is my favorite for one very important reason: it was the first fanfiction I ever wrote.  That’s right, the first.  The idea was conceived after I’d found a  lot of very bad InuYasha fanfic.  I won’t name names—to be honest, I can’t remember much from any of them.  I just kept thinking that InuYasha would just not act like that; not ever.  I couldn’t wrap my head around most of the characterizations I found, which is not to say that the stories were bad.  If they were wholly original characters then they would’ve been great.  They just weren’t InuYasha …

So I figured I’d write a story that I wanted to read.  I thought that would be the best way to go about it.  So I wrote the first chapter, and I posted it.  It was easy to write, and it was such a free feeling, a beautiful feeling.  For the first time ever, I was writing not only because I loved the story (I love all the stories I’ve written) but also there is a certain level of total freedom when one is writing fanfiction.  You’re not bound by the nagging thought in the back of your head that you cannot go too over the top or publishers won’t like it.  It’s not a huge thought, but it is there.  Freedom …

And to my amazement, I got a review within … minutes …?  Something like that.  Here is the key: I honestly didn’t expect anyone to read my ramblings.  I just wanted to envision a story that I felt ‘worked’.  In my mind, Purity was that story.  Yes, Chronicles worked, and yes, Metamorphosis did, too (though I daresay that Metamorphosis was more about Kagome than InuYasha, IMO).  Purity, however, was exactly what it was supposed to be: a pure, untainted love story about losing something precious but learning to achieve something even greater, and when I started writing it, I knew two things: I knew where I was starting, and I knew where I would end it.

The one thing about Purity that I didn’t anticipate was one adorable little youkai child with black hair and a tai-youkai’s attitude: Toga.

Now the thing is, I never wanted to write a continuation.  I thought that those were worse than bad!fic.  I’d started to read a couple of those, too, and ended up putting them aside because, well, the characters were just not nearly as interesting as they should have been.  Here’s something that I’ve wanted to say a million times but never did because I was afraid I’d offend someone (though not on purpose): just because you’ve started with a known character, whether you use that character as a jump-off point or as a main character, doesn’t mean that you don’t have to flesh that character out.  Now, let’s not chew it to death, but … if any of the characters were exactly like their parents, what’s the point?  As any person in real life if their children are exactly like them, and you’ll have someone laughing right in your face.  They’re not.  Characters are shaped by other characters, yes, whether directly or indirectly, and whether it is for the good or ill.  Toga learned from watching his parents and the polar opposites, InuYasha and Kagome, and he decided for himself what he wanted from life, and Sierra?  She was just the girl next door—a good girl who didn’t mind moments of badness, sweet enough to land Toga while brassy enough to stand up to Sesshoumaru, too.

Toga.  *happy sigh* Then the twins.

The twins were something else.  They started out bad: hair pulling, etc … Then they got worse.

Ryomaru was so much like his father that it was just interesting to me.  Just what might InuYasha have been like had he been raised in a time and in a place where he didn’t have to fight and in an era when he wasn’t looked upon as an outcast?  Well, he might well have ended up like Ryomaru.  That he did things backward when it came to claiming his mate?  It was just too funny to pass up, and Nezumi is a girl that I can identify with.  I may not be exactly like her, but there were times when I felt like she did, absolutely.

Kichiro, though, leaned more toward his mother’s mentality, and for that, we love him, too.  The real trouble with Kichiro was finding the perfect woman to compliment him in every way.  Unlike Ryomaru, who really wanted a lover who was also his best friend, Kichiro needed to have someone who was confident in her own life, in who she was and who she would be: someone who could stand up to Kichiro’s arrogance and shine: someone who didn’t mind letting him be the larger than life hero while never fading in his shadow.  And Bellaniece was born: a gorgeous girl with a heart.  She was fantastic from the get-go, and she still is.

Heading into Purity 4, I thought it’d be great to write a father-daughter dynamic that was a stark contrast to InuYasha’s slightly overbearing love for his own daughter, Gin.  From the start, I knew that Cain had to be big as a character.  He had big shoes to fill, right?  For a girl who idolized her father, nothing less would do.  (Of course, uchinanchuduckie didn’t help when she first sent me these awesome sketches of a character named Cain … They were intimidating to me … I had to write a character who was good enough to live up to those sketches …) InuYasha had always said that Gin couldn’t date just anyone, didn’t he?  So maybe he should be more careful what he wishes for in the future.  I mean, who could be better for his baby girl than the North American tai-youkai …?

Cain was both the easiest and the hardest character I’ve ever written.  From the start, I knew that Gin was the girl for him: the one woman who wasn’t actually trying to win his heart.  He was and is, first and foremost, her friend.  If she had come on strong from the start (if she even knew how—she didn’t), he would have run fast and run hard back to his domain in Maine.  Somehow, though, he turned out to be a beautiful character despite the things in his past that really could have hardened him completely.  To this day, I’m proud of that story, and in many ways, Purity 4 is my favorite because I feel that I could see the largest growth in me as a writer from the first one to that one.

And it was supposed to have been the last, wasn’t it?  That’s what I said at the time.

But that baby—Sebastian …

Now I guess I should say now that I’ve always loved shy guys, and Bas really shouldn’t have been shy, right?  Big, beautiful Bas was the quintessential all-American boy, but his shyness was just too cute.  A lot of people have said that he was the guy Cain should have been if he hadn’t lost his parents and his first wife.  I don’t agree.  In my mind, Bas is much more like his late grandfather, Keijizen than he was like Cain … and Sydnie?  Well, she’s kind of a one-of-a-kind kinda girl, isn’t she?

Jillian and Gavin were just fun.  Underline that another time or two.  Fun.  Their story is one of my favorites because it tends to be lighthearted all the way through.  (okay, most of the way through).  The best friends.  I love that.

Isabelle and Griffin was a return to angst for me, and anyone who has talked to me knows that I adore angst.  Actually, I can usually write angst faster than I can write comedy.  Comedy tends to get boring to me after a fashion.  Angst is more fun for me because I can play with words, because I can use them to convey the fear or heartbreak or anxiety, and who was better at that than angst-muffin Griffin?  No one, right?  Isabelle is much like her mother, and that was also good for me, too.

Samantha … Samantha and Kurt were very important for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the return to the basics of Sango and Miroku—not the pervy part, of course, but the moments when I saw a more serious side to him in the anime and manga.  That was the part of Miroku that really interested me … and there are very important things in this story that will not be entirely evident until much later.

Which brings us to Evan and Valerie and Purity 9, right?

Okay, I’ll admit it.  Evan’s so entirely quirky and over the top that I can’t help but adore him, and Valerie?  Well, in a lot of ways, she’s more ‘me’ than any of the women in any of the other stories. Sure, there are parts of me in every single character I write, but Valerie … her outlook, her personality, her sense of humor are more like me than anyone else.  Their story is just a lot of fun to write, but both of them have a lot of issues to work through.

A lot of times, people ‘criticize’ me, saying that my stories are too long.  You know something, though?  I would rather write a longer story where the growth of the characters is the focus than to write something with a lick and a promise where you’re left wondering just how someone got from point A to point F without knowing what B through E were.  Glossing over things is lazy.  After all, would it have really made sense in the end if Cain had decided that Gin was absolutely worth living for in twenty chapters?  And even if it were possible to have written any of it ‘shorter’, would the story stand out in anyone’s mind after six months or a year or more?  If it’s worth writing, it’s worth writing well.  That’s what I try to do: write well.  I don’t profess to be the best writer out there.  I’m learning and evolving with everything I write.  What I do profess is to try to write the best story that *I* can, and as long as I feel that a story is worth telling, then I will tell it.  If someone doesn’t want to read it, then I don’t lose sleep over it.  If someone thinks, “Oh, another Purity, duh” then that’s their opinion.  The bottom line is that I love all my stories for different reasons, and I’m sure that I’ll love the next three just as much, too.

In fact, I can’t wait to write those three.  We have ‘cute’, we have ‘angst’, and then we have the ultimate form of comeuppance … and I’m looking forward to them all …

posted by Sueric at 5:17 am  
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